either.... ego or ..... very essence?

A letter

TO: the collective consciousness of all people who care to know 

CC: Eckhart Tolle

Dear reader,

I recently read Eckhart Tolle’s book ‘A New Earth’.
I was enjoying the book a great deal, but in the light of ‘the palette of choice’ project, I couldn’t help noticing that the painted picture on ‘living in the now’‘ seems to contain a great deal of “either….. or….“ options, which may by troubling the MIND (Managing Information for New Developments) of an interested reader.

With all due respect for my colleague Eckhart Tolle and his pioneering work to help people focus on the opportunities offered in the NOW..... some things were not quite sitting well with my preferred palette of choice..

The way he writes about the "ego" seems to me to be somewhat at odds with what he also writes: "What you resist persists and gets even stronger.”.

In his descriptions, the ego seems to be identified as the source of all madness and the root of all evil; a very clever illusion that lurks around and jumps on any occasion to interfere with your everyday life during unguarded moments. Reason? So that you (again) come to believe that you ARE  'the ego'.

Why would that be a problem?

Well, ego-based behaviour is said to be the root of all pain and suffering; if not for yourself, then surely for others.

And, as a (wannabe) enlightened being… that is surely the last thing you would want, isn’t it?

Eckhart Tolle seems to suggest that it would best not to feed your ego with "negative" energy, because that would also feed the pain-body.  This entity, which also dwells in you, has the power to create quite some havoc in your inner household - to the point where you can even become “not yourself”.

The way he puts it may lead to this happening:- in everything you do, you start to wonder "Oh dear, is this now my ego or not?”
In ‘palette of choice-speak’: “ Is this either good/non-ego-based… or bad/ ego-based?”

And with the slightest suspicion that your ego might be involved in your thoughts, feelings and actions, you then chose to do your utmost best to prevent this ego-driven behaviour from happening ......

If  ‘experiencing enlightenment’ is your goal, this approach is likely to backfire on you, given ‘what you resist persists and gets even stronger’.

‘Thinking' is another thing Eckhart Tolle doesn’t seem to consider to be charming or very helpful in Being Yourself.

What he recommends is "Presence," a conscious presence in the moment.  Applying that allows you to accept all of this NOW with full attention, without thinking about it.

And as much as I do know and appreciate how Presence feels and works, I also know that's very complicated for beginners in the field of working with a heightened degree of awareness and consciousness to BE that; to apply that skilfully.  Especially in difficult situations where all kinds of emotions and thoughts are tumbling around in their system and you’re easily triggered into ‘either….or…… choices’ inspired by either…..fight…. or flightimpulses in a perceived crisis situation.

Then what?

Using my talent for finding and proposing really simple practical options, this is what I see could work, even for a beginner.

I think it is feasible for anybody to apply just one leading question on any challenging situation.

• A question which both… your ego and… your innermost being find interesting to play with, which saves you having to deal with an inner conflict  (Being or Doing, Ego or Self) within the turmoil of the situation.
• A question that focuses your attention, in an open way, on what is really present in the here and now (which automatically activates the Presence of your innermost being)
• Something you are allowed, without tension, to actively think about (which activates your active consciousness) without having to put energy into the effort of you trying to stop thinking.  Given the beginner level of consciousness, it is simply not very likely at this time that you’ll succeed in stopping thinking - the energies present are too powerful and they don’t ‘bend’ for the powers you can confidently apply right now.

That leading question in any situation could be:

"What is of value (for me) in this situation?"

With all the things that come up you keep asking this very same question, as calmly as possible, until there is nothing more of value that you haven’t noticed or picked up.
 You know when you've reached that point, because you are then very calm, with a positive feeling. If necessary, you can walk away quietly; you let it go.  

The reason? 
You know deep within that you have left nothing behind of great value to you (or "lost" anything), in that situation.

"Value? Value?! ... Hey .... there is disappointment!" may shout a voice within you.”

"Yes, thank you for bringing that under my attention. Show me, please….what is the value for me in noticing the fact that disappointment is there, now?”

This way you show that you accept that disappointment IS present. In ‘palette of choice speak’: “ I accept both… the knocking at my door and….. the entering of the message and.. that I have to give it my full attention in order to be heard and understood.

You do not fight it, but are showing interest in its value.  Not so much inquiring why the disappointment is there, because that could quite quickly lead to a focus on what's missing in this situation, nor what is wrong about it and what others (preferably, of course ;-) ) have done wrong.

‘Either…right, or….wrong’ thinking patterns activate, at high speed, the "negative spiral" that is not likely to open up the full palette of choice within you.

No, this question focuses on what for you is all vitally important to experience.

What happens under the bonnet is this:

• Your ego interprets this question as: "What is of high value for me, personally?" 
• Leaning towards: What can I get out of this? What is in it for me, at a personal level?
• Your deepest essence interprets this question as: "What occurs here in my Presence (what presents itself to me), that is of high collective value?" .... 
• Leaning towards: What can I bring here? What is it that I can shine my light on?

It would be very nice if you can invite both parts to put their respective answers together in this formula:

" The VALUE of experiencing ‘X’ in this situation is that I KNOW I LOVE  ‘Y’ ".

This formula works wonders, because it contains the three magic ingredients Tolle has identified: acceptance, joy and enthusiasm.

To put it in my own words:

• You focus on the value of this experience, which shifts your attention to Joy (Joy of Being). This actively makes a connection with the desire of your innermost being.
• You make a statement in which you indicate that you are connected to The Knowing (the collective consciousness). This Knowing has a more versatile multi-layered, multichannel, multidimensional range of qualities than 'thinking'.
• You say openly and honestly that you love. You feel that love, remember that love, embrace the object of your affection with your attention, here and now. Love, so they say, is the most powerful energy that you can call forward to bring relief to a situation.

I KNOW I LOVE, might very well be YOU Acknowledging Who You Really Are; Being the Knowing of your Whole Self.

In following this formula, you do absolutely nothing to push anything away in order to freely embrace what you value. (not somebody else’s experience, not even your ego, not even your pain)

In addition to that …. energetically ….. it is much easier working/playing /dealing with what IS, then with what is missing.

It even works in the material world.
Try building anything with the stones that are missing and …. it will not succeed. But if building something sturdy is the sought after thing of real value, you’ll probably see other building materials currently present in the situation that you can use to fulfil the very same purpose.

Examples of applying the formula?

You order soup to eat and it arrives cold.  You wish to calmly resolve the situation.  Applying the formula you consider:-

• The value of experiencing disappointment in this situation, is that I know I love hot soup.
• The value of experiencing anger in this situation, is that I know I love openness and honesty.
• The value of experiencing frustration in this situation is that I know I love mutual respect and clear communication.

Knowing those answers will bring you peacefully, joyfully and fully automatically into the lukk palette of choice, working with all that IS (relevant), here and now.

Then, the next natural question pops up: "Okay, what is the best way of dealing with this situation now, in line with my highest values… those high values of which I have now reminded myself.” 

This act of reminding was not done by thinking or making them up, but by knowing - which is naturally firmly rooted in my own experiences in the dynamics of the choicesprocess.

Then, your innermost Being (which you have invited to shine its light on this situation) gives you instantly suitable choices.
Because you are now quite calm, in open contact with your consciousness and the Knowing, you’ll be able to notice those high value suggestions for dealing with this situation.
Based on those solid, truthful foundations you choose, in a natural way and with calm enthusiasm, a pattern of behaviour that fits your highest values ​​and serves all you need for this moment.

Of course you can say:

"Hey, but wait a second…… the hot soup, the openness, the honesty ,the respect and clear communication were not in that situation ..... ! Because nobody brought it in, it was missing!
You too have got to see that and understand it! It is obvious.”

Bear with me, because I do not deny this and I do understand the statement.

However, once YOU actively and lovingly remind yourself of the ‘joy’ of hot soup, once you have communicated openly and honestly and clearly with respect to yourself in this situation, then you have energetically inserted into this situation what you find important. Somebody has brought it in – you.
It is a new NOW in that moment, where this knowing is a part of the whole energetic situation.
What you clearly find important is to have acces to your full palette of human choices, to apply the your true colours onto the canvas of this situation.

Even more important than the question whether-you-are-right-or-wrong, or that something is-or-has-been-missing  or you’ve been-done-wrong-by-another, you have tapped into your power about how you can deal with the situation in line with your own highest values and all your needs.

Whether that other person does or doesn’t give you what you would like to receive…
Whether or not that material thing is there …..
You wind yourself up a lot less about it! It is not a life threatening crisis and you know it.

Whether you ARE either….your “ego” or…… your "very essence" has become a largely irrelevant matter too, because the two are comfortably working together as one, as a constructively collective whole, acting for the* best interests.

* Notice how I write here THE best interests and not 'your own personal interests’. "

Your innermost being positively fed your ego, with food of the highest quality ..... joy, attention and opportunities.
Your ego, who has the function to help you develop your identity as a unique human being within the context of the whole collective, has seized an opportunity for sustainable personal growth.

Your unique-me-standing-out-from-the-crowd-ego (the part of you that endeavours to develop a pleasant, unique identity in a way that has benefits for you) has experienced, with this approach, the overall interest is strongly related to his / her / your personal interest. So…… there is no threat the ego has to strongly respond to in it’s characteristic way.

The whole aim of your life is to be (both) a unique human being (and) within the dynamic context of the collective Being.

Both…. peace and…. joyful, in an ever evolving way.

(-: